Being unable to bring their wives from India because of legal restrictions Punjabis formed relationships with local women and those who wanted stable life started marrying. Because of strong anti-Punjabi bias among the Anglos these Punjabi pioneers turned to Mexican women. Whom they found culturally and ethnically more compatible but what really disturbed the Punjabi pioneers was the concept of courtship romantic love and extra-marital affairs and Mexican women’s right to divorce. Equally shocking was the fact that at lower social economic levels many Mexican men and women entered into free unions without civil or religious marriages. The martial histories of the Mexican and Mexican-American women who married Punjabis often featured multiple marriages or sequential marriages producing children by several husbands a concept totally alien to the Punjabi culture. Mola Singh a Punjabi pioneer thus describes this novel experience in the new homeland: In this country it’s a different class of people. You can’t force love here women go where they want to even if they’re married even with three or four kids. A woman can have four husbands a man can have two or three women. What you gonna do that’s the way with love…(p.105) Poor Mola Singh soon lost his second Hispanic wife also this time during an evening at drinking party in his home Then in 1934 or 1936 this Maria went a way She went to aman who worked for me Galindo. We were having a big party with my cousin Lalo (the single one my cousin brother who farmed with me) and Buta Singh and his wife and Mola Singh and Julia and my father. It was a big party we all drank And that Mexican boy. I wanted someone to make food so I called Maria to get him to come in the kitchen to make food. She said yes hell comes if I call him. And he did come he made roti and other things. We ate and we Hindu men all watched the lovers. We saw how they looked at each other. We all knew. Mola said you know what she’s doing i won’t let mine do that. I asked her do you love him more. She said yes I love him more. So thither and I kicked them both they went to Mexico (p p 105106) Inspite of having quickly lost two wives due to divorce Mola Singh remained steadfast in his support of Western concept of romantic love. Again it is Mola Singhs account that shows how Punjabi men thought of love. According to Karen he learned the meaning of love in the United States during an affair with an elderly white woman in the Imperial Valley and described how he had gone in love. In his personal life Mola Singh became supporter of the idea of love between men and women initially based on sexual attraction as the best basis for a relationship. However majority of Punjabis did not share Mola Singhs views and preferred to stay stable in their married lives and disliked the idea of extra-marital loyalties. Typical of Punjabi men’s jealous possession over land and women some of them even murdered their wives when they became doubtful of their marital fidelity and in certain cases murdered the men suspected of having affairs with their wives. Some men divorced their wives because they went out shopping in the town bought and used make up and went dancing which was alien to the Punjabi male temperament. Mexican women did not like their Punjabi husband’s habits of sending money home to the Sikh Temple in Stockton and the Gadder party. Some Mexican wives complained of being forced to cook for all their husbands friends and washing their clothes. When one woman getting fed up with this threatened Either he goes or I go the man quickly moved to a separate home to avoid losing his wife One Punjabi put up an interesting notice in a local newspaper: To Whom It May Concern . She having let my bed and board I am no longer responsible for the debts of my wife Maria Juarez Singh. Notwithstanding above tensions most Punjabi men lived happily with their Mexican wives produced children and shared common social and material culture. While none of the Mexican wives learned Punjabi and their Punjabi husbands could not master Spanish still they could manage the daily routine very well. During a recent visit to my daughter in California I found an interesting working arrangement with their Mexican baby-sitter. While my daughter talked to her in English her mother-in-law spoke Punjabi -both languages being alien to the Mexican maid On finding as for how they communicated 1 noticed it was the language of signs and commonsense that helped on the routine. However it were the second generation of mixed Punjabis born out of the wedlock of Punjabi men and Hispanic women who faced peculiar difficulties because of their ethnic identity. Since invariably all the early Sikhs who married Mexican women children were raised not strictly in the Sikh tradition. While the men retained their faith in Sikhism they allowed their Mexican wives to follow Christianity. However on every Sunday they all visited the Sikh Temple in Stock-ton which was the first Gurdwara in the Imperial Valley established in 1912. It were not only the Sikhs and their Mexican wives and children but also other Punjabis both Hindus and Muslims who visited the Gurdwara every Sunday. That was perhaps one reason that the Sikh Temple of Stockton became a major center of Indian nationalist activities and head-quarters of the revolutionary Ghadar Party. Again there was no segregation of men and women. To most of the second generation kids Stockton Gurdwara was where one met Other Hindu kids. Another woman described The Stockton temple that is where we met the Khan kids every year coming from Phoenix to pick peaches. Prof. Leonard thus describes the ups and downs of the historic Sikh Temple: At the Stockton Sikh temple political struggles over temple management were fierce in the late 1940s with new leaders institutionalizing social and specifically Sikh religious reforms. Permission was secured from Amritsar in the Punjab to use chairs instead of sitting on the floor and Prasad (c6nsecrated food) was served on paper plate with spoons and paper napkins. Turbans and beards discarded by most attenders became an issue when the first clean-shaven secretary was Nika Singh Gill (19471948). Both leaders were younger than most of the early pioneers.. Gill led the crusade to admit Dalip Singh Saund and his Anglo wife to temple membership (and Dr. J. N. Sharma and his English wife) (p.167) It was the partition of India in 1947 which alienated the Punjabi Muslims and recently the developments in Punjab which have weaned the Punjabi Hindus away from the Sikh Temple in Stockton Quickly falling in line with revivalist movement in Punjab the Punjab Sikhs in California particularly those in Stockton also said good bye to their old traditions of composite Punjabi culture and turned the historic Sikh Temple of Stockton into a rendezvous of Khalistani supporters Didar Singh Bains a second generation Sikh who moved from El Centro to Yuba city and made a fortune from his 6000 acres of orchards took control of the Sikh Temple in Stockton Earlier a clean-shaven and married to a woman of Punjabi-Mexican origin Bains became an Amritdhari in 1981 and is one of the Trustees of the Sikh Foundation of U.S.A. While most Sikhs celebrated their new found identity Mola Singh is perhaps the only survivor among the Punjabi pioneers who could not reconcile to this change: About our churches here everybody went to the Stockton one Hindu Muslim everybody went. Afterward these days now don’t know what they’re doing. It belonged to everybody the public anybody could go. One thing I don’t like not for that new group not everybody can go Before the Hindu men married women here You know everybody married white women everybody married Mexican women everybody went to church. And our people everybody went and sat on chairs. That was before not now..

Being unable to bring their wives from India because of legal restrictions Punjabis formed relationships with local women and those who wanted stable life started marrying. Because of strong anti-Punjabi bias among the Anglos these Punjabi pioneers turned to Mexican women. Whom they found culturally and ethnically more compatible but what really disturbed the Punjabi pioneers was the concept of courtship romantic love and extra-marital affairs and Mexican women’s right to divorce. Equally shocking was the fact that at lower social economic levels many Mexican men and women entered into free unions without civil or religious marriages. The martial histories of the Mexican and Mexican-American women who married Punjabis often featured multiple marriages or sequential marriages producing children by several husbands a concept totally alien to the Punjabi culture. Mola Singh a Punjabi pioneer thus describes this novel experience in the new homeland:

In this country it’s a different class of people. You can’t force love here women go where they want to even if they’re married even with three or four kids. A woman can have four husbands a man can have two or three women. What you gonna do that’s the way with love…(p.105) Poor Mola Singh soon lost his second Hispanic wife also this time during an evening at drinking party in his home

Then in 1934 or 1936 this Maria went a way She went to aman who worked for me Galindo. We were having a big party with my cousin Lalo (the single one my cousin brother who farmed with me) and Buta Singh and his wife and Mola Singh and Julia and my father. It was a big party we all drank And that Mexican boy. I wanted someone to make food so I called Maria to get him to come in the kitchen to make food. She said yes hell comes if I call him. And he did come he made roti and other things. We ate and we Hindu men all watched the lovers. We saw how they looked at each other. We all knew. Mola said you know what she’s doing i won’t let mine do that. I asked her do you love him more. She said yes I love him more. So thither and I kicked them both   they went to Mexico (p p 105106)

Inspite of having quickly lost two wives due to divorce Mola Singh remained steadfast in his support of Western concept of romantic love. Again it is Mola Singhs account that shows how Punjabi men thought of love. According to Karen he learned the meaning of love in the United States during an affair with an elderly white woman in the Imperial Valley and described how he had gone in love. In his personal life Mola Singh became supporter of the idea of love between men and women initially based on sexual attraction as the best basis for a relationship.

However majority of Punjabis did not share Mola Singhs views and preferred to stay stable in their married lives and disliked the idea of extra-marital loyalties. Typical of Punjabi men’s jealous possession over land and women some of them even murdered their wives when they became doubtful of their marital fidelity and in certain cases murdered the men suspected of having affairs with their wives. Some men divorced their wives because they went out shopping in the town bought and used make up and went dancing which was alien to the Punjabi male temperament. Mexican women did not like their Punjabi husband’s habits of sending money home to the Sikh Temple in Stockton and the Gadder party. Some Mexican wives complained of being forced to cook for all their husbands friends and washing their clothes. When one woman getting fed up with this threatened Either he goes or I go the man quickly moved to a separate home to avoid losing his wife One Punjabi put up an interesting notice in a local newspaper: To Whom It May Concern .

 She having let my bed and board I am no longer responsible for the debts of my wife Maria Juarez Singh.

Notwithstanding above tensions most Punjabi men lived happily with their Mexican wives produced children and shared common social and material culture. While none of the Mexican wives learned Punjabi and their Punjabi husbands could not master Spanish still they could manage the daily routine very well. During a recent visit to my daughter in California I found an interesting working arrangement with their Mexican baby-sitter. While my daughter talked to her in English her mother-in-law spoke Punjabi -both languages being alien to the Mexican maid On finding as for how they communicated 1 noticed it was the language of signs and commonsense that helped   on the routine. However it were the second generation of mixed Punjabis born out of the wedlock of Punjabi men and Hispanic women who faced peculiar difficulties because of their ethnic identity. Since invariably all the early Sikhs who married Mexican women children were raised not strictly in the Sikh tradition. While the men retained their faith in Sikhism they allowed their Mexican wives to follow Christianity. However on every Sunday they all visited the Sikh Temple in Stock-ton which was the first Gurdwara in the Imperial Valley established in 1912.

 It were not only the Sikhs and their Mexican wives and children but also other Punjabis both Hindus and Muslims who visited the Gurdwara every Sunday. That was perhaps one reason that the Sikh Temple of Stockton became a major center of Indian nationalist activities and head-quarters of the revolutionary Ghadar Party. Again there was no segregation of men and women. To most of the second generation kids Stockton Gurdwara was where one met Other Hindu kids. Another woman described The Stockton temple that is where we met the Khan kids every year coming from Phoenix to pick peaches. Prof. Leonard thus describes the ups and downs of the historic Sikh Temple:

At the Stockton Sikh temple political struggles over temple management were fierce in the late 1940s with new leaders institutionalizing social and specifically Sikh religious reforms. Permission was secured from Amritsar in the Punjab to use chairs instead of sitting on the floor and Prasad (c6nsecrated food) was served on paper plate with spoons and paper napkins. Turbans and beards discarded by most attenders became an issue when the first clean-shaven secretary was Nika Singh Gill (19471948). Both leaders were younger than most of the early pioneers.. Gill led the crusade to admit Dalip Singh Saund and his Anglo wife to temple membership (and Dr. J. N. Sharma and his English wife) (p.167)

It was the partition of India in 1947 which alienated the Punjabi Muslims and recently the developments in Punjab which have weaned the Punjabi Hindus away from the Sikh Temple in Stockton Quickly falling in line with revivalist movement in Punjab the Punjab Sikhs in California particularly those in Stockton also said good bye to their old traditions of composite Punjabi culture and turned the historic Sikh Temple of Stockton into a rendezvous of Khalistani supporters Didar Singh Bains a second generation Sikh who moved from El Centro to Yuba city and made a fortune from his 6000 acres of orchards took control of the Sikh Temple in Stockton Earlier a clean-shaven and married to a woman of Punjabi-Mexican origin Bains became an Amritdhari in 1981  and is one of the Trustees of the Sikh Foundation of U.S.A. While most Sikhs celebrated their new found identity Mola Singh is perhaps the only survivor among the Punjabi pioneers who could not reconcile to this change: About our churches here everybody went to the Stockton one Hindu Muslim everybody went. Afterward these days now don’t know what they’re doing.

It belonged to everybody the public anybody could go. One thing I don’t like not for that new group not everybody can go Before the Hindu men married women here You know everybody married white women everybody married Mexican women everybody went to church. And our people everybody went and sat on chairs. That was before not now..

Article extracted from this publication >> July 1, 1994